First Post

9/24

First Post hey? Yeah that's right, first post. The first in a string of posts that will take me to the top of the world of pessimistic sports analysis. Oh you haven't heard of PSA? Well I would not feel so alone, everybody must get... to know PSA (thanks Bob).

Truth is I'm not a true pessimist. Its more imagery, meant to coax your minds into thinking that my unique and often times far-fetched perspectives on that which entertains me is correct.

Nonetheless, this is my blog.

Topic #1: Sexy Rexy or Ano-Rex-Ic Grossman?

Has this guy ever had any talent? Some (from chicago) would say yes. Others (from every place not called chicago, and others based in the windy city) would laugh. Runner up to the heisman trophy? Guess that would make him next in line to be the second best grocery-bagger at my local stop & shop behind the eventual heisman winner, Eric Crouch. Sure, anybody succeeding Jesse Palmer taking snaps is bound to look good doing so, but at this point, can anyone truly say they would rather be Rex over Jesse. Jesse played backup on a Giants team that never gave him the opportunity to show how bad he truly was. Rex, at the forefront of an anemic Chicago offense not lead, but followed his team to the superbowl on behalf of the 3rd all-convict team behind the 2003 Trail-Blazers and the 1999 Dallas Stars (who collectively conspired to STEAL the Stanley Cup for the BUffalo Sabres, which albeit on a tangent i must mention have not recovered since, even if you consider last year a success, there is no recipe that can on its own maintain the attractiveness of a team and a city, similar to that of hoisting your respective sport's championship trophy, ... just ask Daniel Briere, Chris Drury, and Louise Duffney. Who is Louise Duffney? The original founder of Duff's famous Buffalo wings, who, in her state of immeasurable furiousity (made up word), moved the famous franchise to Toronto. The significance? The Leafs haven't won the cup since 66, yet still as all Buffalo wings do, Mrs. Duffney decided to pack it in and head for a more sports-friendly city ((((((The Rochester Americans and Syracuse Nationals no longer count, and frankly aren't that close)))) and yes, i stick to my guns that Chris Drury is a true wing and will return to that position once the likes of Brandon Dubinsky and Artem Anisimov have developed NHL compatible muscle...

Back to the Palmer v. Grossman comparison (apologize for the law school-influenced method of writing versus). Palmer was on the bachelor while counterpart Rex??? Well he was runner up for the Heisman.

And now, even the Soldier field faithul are chanting "Griese, Griese". Keep in mind that if not for a gift from the Blazers (Jordan), one near perfect season from Ditka's Bears (1985), and a recent White Sox team that simply capitalized on the rest of the competition's deadly combination of mediocrity and complacency, Chicago would still be hanging on to hopes for the first Cubs world Series since..

When did god say let there be light? CORRECT! Alex i'll take... you get the point.

Yet the Cubs are still the heart and soul of that city (Hot Dogs were disqualified because Hot Dogs kill your heart and consequently your soul). Meanwhile, Big Sexy leads his team to a Superbowl one year, and essentially three weeks later starts hearing calls for his head. Long live the queen.

Moosh-in-tofu Muhammed has been invisible. Had to get that out of the way

Long live... BERNARD BERRIAN?

Before this past Monday's (9/23) football game, the last time you heard Griese's name was when he retired after losing the starting job to... JAKE PLUMMER. Seems as if Rex is slowly burying himself beneath a mountain of NFL names synonymous with disappointment.

Suddenly being Jesse Palmer isn't looking half bad is it?

Advantage Jesse Palmer

Disadvantage Chicago Bears.


Other Notes:

3:10 to Yuma is a great movie. Luke Wilson should be shot and killed quickly in movies more often. And Peter Fonda looks like he just finished Bogarting George Hanson's (Jack Nicholson's) joint, my friend.

Shrimp Dumplings are really delicious

Its starting to get cold... quick, burn more gasoline.

You know what really makes a party? Fluffy whip. But not when you put it on stuff.